Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Finding Happiness...

A couple of months ago I wrote a post about being happy- and I guess I have some more to add to it now. I talked about my happiness scale and how different things rate on my "happiness continuum" This last weekend Lily was with her Dad from Friday all the way until Monday- I had a lot time to myself to do what I wanted and just think and be I guess.

This weekend I bought plants at Lowe's and had so much fun getting them all potted and pretty. I can't wait for them to grow and it reminds me how much someday I really want to be able to have a real garden growing lots of things...I also started working on a new art project- sort of a painting/ paper collage. If you've ever looked at the blogs I follow ---> the Finding Home blog author does some very cool work. Her blog gave me some inspiration to try my own artwork- on a little bit bigger scale than just cards. And as I was working and having that time I realized that this art- whatever it may be- is a really big part of who I am. I think I let it go too long-didn't do enough- and when it came to the question...who am I? What is interesting about me? There weren't really any answers...I was just being...living and breathing having to go on autopilot Mom mode for so long. I guess now I finally feel like I can be more. Lily is more independent and able to entertain herself. And I am finding the time to do the things that make me happy.

I am happy being independent. I had really forgotten how much I enjoyed it-so I was soaking it all up when Lily was gone all weekend. It also reminded me how that even though sometimes I think it would be nice to start dating (meeting people again???) I feel like right now adding anyone extra to the mix I would have to give up the carefully allotted "me" time I am really enjoying...maybe someday I'll feel differently about it- I'm just not there yet.
Anyway...enough about me...Lily's teacher did her hair yesterday in these cute little stick up all around twists- but as soon as we got in the car they weren't comfortable for her so she had me take them out : ( so I didn't get a picture- too cute though. She is really getting tall- a bunch of her pants are getting too short- now they are "capri pants" haha. Oh, and that reminds me that I want to get a little ruler set up to measure her (maybe just a long piece of paper taped to the wall or something) so we can see how much she's grown... it seems like she's grown quite a bit taller in the last few months or so. Otherwise she's still just Lily. Mostly happy and sweet (kind of clingy after being gone so many days!) And very excited about our Fort Warden trip coming up this weekend. She's so excited to go on a ferry boat again, and me too! PS That was the first time I have ever added a link within my blog... now that I know how...who knows what I'll come up with ; )